theboywhowaits

To Whom it may concern,

In the event of my death, dismemberment, erasure from existence or decent into a comatose state, I leave what worldly possessions and missives to the following.

To Sakura I leave the entire coffee and snack supply of medical, and request that you feed Howard in regular occasions. I also ask you to look after Amy and my daughter and to fill the gap of stepping on toes in my absence. Continue to buck convention; you need nothing more from me. (You’ll find the supplies in the jammed locker in possessions. Use them to the best of your abilities.)

To Howard I leave my medkit and hope that it will serve you well wherever life takes you, you’re worth far more than you think you are, and far more than people have told you. And I can safely say that now because I’m dead and you can’t scowl at me. I know you can be a good man, despite what happened to you, and I’m sorry I won’t be there to see that.

To Miranda, I leave my watch. There is never enough time in the day for everything we intend to do, We can only do what there is time for, and hope that the rest of it waits until we have the time to address it. Breathe, Miranda. You are a far better person than you give yourself credit, you waste too much time doubting yourself when they best course of action would be to continue forward and do as you know is right. I know you can do this, I can see this person in you. Take the time you need, and don’t worry so much about making all the time fit together.

To Jamie, I leave my armor. It probably won’t save you from getting shot in the leg again, but at least you’ll look intimidating doing it. Thank you, for everything. I can’t think of much more to say than that.

To Tim, I leave my goggles. You spend too much time wearing a mask, and I doubt they’ll fit over it well, but at least they’ll protect your identity for a little while. Trust yourself to be yourself, Tim. Please. It’s all well and good to be nothing but a hero, but the hero is in the end just a man. When he becomes nothing more than a legend, he loses the meaning of why he started on his journey. I know you’ll understand that someday. I just hope you embrace it.

To the Doctor, there’s a box under Amy and my bed, inside is a…very strange creature, I think you’ll enjoy it. I also have a request to make of you. Look after Amy, Look after Molly and River and Jamie, and continue being a good man. There’s a saying on my world “Absolute Power Corrupts Absolutely”, it’s almost always true. Please continue to defy the odds and drop out of the sky and shake the foundations of the world for those who never thought to move them. I will always value the time I spent with you. I will always value the lessons you taught me. And I will always value the adventures, as much as I longed for home. You were – and are – amazing, Doctor.

To River, I leave you a music box. You’ve been alone for a long time, and I know how quiet that gets. I hope this adds a little noise to your isolation. You keep too many secrets; I wish that you could trust someone. I hope the future you want materializes for you. What secrets I do know go with me, I never told Amy. What was it…Two men can keep a secret from the Doctor when one of them is dead? Your secret is safe. You are an admirable person, and I’m sorry I did not get to know you better.

To Conner, I leave you my sword and everything that comes with it. When my father first taught me to use it, one of the first lessons my brothers and I were taught was what the sword meant. It was not just a weapon of battle, but a weapon to protect. The greatest thing a man could hope to do was die protecting his family. And yet I hope you never do that. You gave me a chance to experience fatherhood in all of its stages, Conner, and I love you very dearly. There was never a difference in my mind between you and a child I might have naturally had. Continue to be brave and strong, protect Amy and your sister. Never stop moving forward. It’s ok to cry when you’re sad, son, or ask for reassurance. I’m pretty sure Amy could use a hug about now.

To Molly, My beautiful little girl. I’m so sorry I won’t be there to see everything. To scare away your first dates and teach you how to drive (Don’t let your mum teach you.) I’m sorry, from the bottom of my heart. There’s a trunk in our room on the TARDIS for you when you’re older, get your brother to help you learn how to use it all. Live well, Molly. Love your mum, listen to your brother, and don’t ever be afraid that you’re less of a person in anyone’s eyes because of how you were born. You are an amazing person, a beautiful child, and I treasure every moment I have had to spend with you, and would only wish for more to hold you. I love you so much, Molly Williams-Pond. Never doubt that, years and years from now when you look back and wonder why I wasn’t there, don’t ever think that it was because I didn’t want to be.

To Amy, What can I say? Don’t glare because I left you for last? Don’t cry too much? Don’t rush off to kill whatever got me and get yourself killed, take a little time to plan? I guess all apply. Amy, Anything that wasn’t left to someone else is yours. I wish I could give you more. If I could put a universe in a box and gift it to you I would. You are every star in the heaven for me, every light in the universe. Without you, a sun can’t light a candle. I wanted years with you, Amy, countless thousands spent by your side. No matter how much time we’ve had, it could never be enough. I love you Amy, I’ve always loved you. From the moment you glared at me across your aunt’s hedge, I knew you were something special. That only grew in time. You were everything that didn’t belong in Leadworth, and all I ever wanted was you. I’m sorry, Amy. Sorry for whatever has brought you to read this. I love you, nothing can ever stop that. So long as the stars in the heavens shine, Rory Williams Loves Amy Pond.

I have likely not thanked all that I should have; I know there are many people I owe a debt to. People who have helped me and who have changed my life for better or worse. Coworkers, friends, teachers. I remember each and every one of you, and though I could not find the words to thank you properly, I do thank you for all that you have done.